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I'm a fucked up, self-loathing, pessimistic, and depressed 16 year old with an eating disorder and a blooming drug addiction.

I know that since the end of the summer is coming it’s going to be a lot different for me and my eating disorder.

Most of the summer it just quietly stays put. Causing me stress, but managing not to get in the way of me having fun. But when the reality of school, people, work, etc start to creep into my mind, the need to look perfect becomes my main priority. 

And I’m desperately waiting for that time to come.

sorry for neglecting you, tumblr.

Somehow in the past few months, I’ve gotten a life. 

Nothing has gotten better though. My eating disorder is still eating me alive.

I’ve just gotten better at concealing it with all the chaos around.

My sister’s boyfriend brought over these two kittens that he was babysitting for a friend over the weekend and they were SO FUCKING CUTE.
Psychologist appointment today…

My doctor referred me to a therapist, who reffered me to a psychiatrist, who has now referred me to a psychologist. And the appointment is in 3 hours and I’m already bingeing and purging.